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SEXUAL ADDICTION: A SHORT COURSE How can I be addicted to sex?
What does this have to do with sex? Sexual acting out is a pretty potent producer of brain chemical response, for one thing. In addition, it is generally so intoxicating that is quiets all of the fears and "bad" feelings that you have been running away from. It gives you the sense of connection, even if only to yourself, that you haven't been able to find otherwise. If you do it with another person you get the attention you have been starving for. If you do it alone, you can achieve a level of comfort, temporarily, that you haven't been able to find elsewhere. So you do it over and over again. I need the excitement! And there is excitement aplenty. Having affairs; worrying about being caught; sneaking around; trying to keep all the lies straight. Or maybe you just flirt with everyone you meet. You sure do get noticed! You convince yourself that it's harmless, just for fun, not hurting anyone. But when you try to stop, you can't. It seems so dull when you just act like "normal" people. You don't get any rush from that at all. Maybe you exhibit yourself. Don't think that this just refers to those men in the raincoats. You wear the revealing clothes to work, and insist that you are just expressing yourself. Personal freedom and integrity, you say, is the issue here. It is not at all about displaying yourself in public. Perhaps you "forget" to zip up when you leave the rest room, hoping that someone will notice you and be impressed. Or how about cybersex? Maybe it is the internet cybersex revolution you've gotten caught up in. It started innocently enough, just looking at the XXXX sites that you found on your email. Just for curiosity. Then you went into the chat rooms where people just like you were meeting one another. No problems here in these rooms you thought, just good clean sex talk! You got started downloading the photos, had a nice collection going, when your spouse, or your kid, or your coworker, or your boss discovered them. Of course they demanded that you stop, or else. But you couldn't. You couldn't stop because you needed the feeling that goes with the forbidden behavior. You needed the relief, the rush, the comfort and the feeling of power, all mixed up into one. This is what addiction feels like. Observers are addicts, too. Perhaps you are one of the people who likes to watch others. Driving around your neighborhood, you know just who undresses in front of their windows without closing the shades. You have a route. You have a routine. You often masturbate while you are peeking at others. You get binoculars, just to get a better look. You're convinced that you are not hurting anyone. Peeping Toms and Tammies are harmless, you think. This is where your addiction has brought you. Your thinking is impaired by you intoxication. You can no longer make judgments based on the standards that you wanted to live by. Your sexual behavior is out of control and you want to get help. You Can Call For Help You can call us at 1-800-754-1452 or email us at RecoveryCentral@aol.com. In the Spirit of Recovery we are here to help you start your new life today. There is no charge for your initial consultation and everything is totally confidential. Why don't you call right now?
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Well, really you're not addicted to sex, but you are addicted to the chemical intoxication you get from acting out in a sexual way. Your brain contains a wonderful chemical factory that responds to your behavior by dumping a flood of brain chemicals. These hormones are intoxicating when dumped in excessive amounts. And when you habitually behave in a risky and dangerous way, the gauge that measures the amount of the chemicals to be released goes berserk, and you get intoxicated, drunk! You know what happens when you get drunk? Your judgment becomes impaired. You think that you can do anything you want to do, without any consequences. So you do it.
